From a speech last year, thanks to the Toledo Blade…
Remarks by Gov. Bob Taft at the Aug. 24, 2004, 50th birthday roast for Tom Noe at Holland Gardens banquet hall. The roast doubled as a fund-raiser for the Lucas County Republican Party.First of all, I want to say that I am not here to embarrass Tom Noe. He’s been a good friend for a long time.
So I’m not going to tell you about the other life that he leads when he’s down there in Columbus. For example, I could tell you there’s a reason Tom chis companympany Vintage Coins & Collectibles the wine stewards in Columbus know him as Magnum Tom. And I’m not going to talk about the time he got up in a Columbus restaurant and sang Oh, Canada to the entire Toronto Maple Leafs hockey team.
No, tonight I’m going to stick to Tom’s important official duties,like the Turnpike Commission.His friends at the turnpike helped him celebrate his 50th by putting a sign on the lawn in front of their building: Tom Noe: 50 Older than the turnpike! And when you think about it there are a lot of similarities between Tom and the turnpike:He’s always taking our $, he’s as dense as concrete, he’s as slick as asphalt, and he’s adding a third lane around his middle.
You may not know that when Tom drove over to Cleveland to attend his first turnpike meeting, he got stopped for speeding. It’s no wonder the guy’s trying to raise the speed limit on the turnpike! Seriously though, Tom’s been a great member and chair of the Ohio Turnpike Commission, and in honor of his leadership, I’m pleased to announce that the Toll Booth at mile 5 will henceforth be known as the Thomas W. Noe Toll Booth. By the way, can’t you just imagine Tom Noe out there in that booth collecting tolls scrutinizing each coin to determine its actual value and cutting deals for drivers who buy some of his rare coins.
Jerry already commented on. I know you all appreciate the irony of Tom, who never graduated from college, chairing the Ohio Board of Regents.Actually, we are going to feature Tom in our new ad to promote college enrollment and completion in Ohio.
Scene #1 shows Tom relaat thisin his lawn chair down athis 100-room mansion in the Florida Keys, while the camera pans over to the foreclosure sign in the front yard.
Scene #2 features Bernadette, Tom’s beautiful, talented, intelligent wife who explains how she has to practice law to support Tom’s lifestyle.
Scene #3 is fi lmed out at Inverness and shows Tom playing golf with the governor of Ohio, but he’s forced to drive with a 3 iron, because he can’t afford to buy a set of woods.
The final scene has Tom in his offi ce at Vintage Coins surrounded by 10-year-old Beanie Babies. As the camera zooms in, Tom says, For God’s sake, finish college. You don’t want to end up like me. To get rich, I had to corner the Beanie Baby market in Toledo!
This is actually somewhat funny.